It was quiet January night, the Hartsells, the family I was living with at the time, had gone out for the night, so I had the house to myself. After a long day at work, all I wanted to do was vegg out in front of the TV. I turned the TV on and started flipping through the channels.
One thing I was glad of since I was living with another family, especially one with four little boys, is that I had my own room. It wasn’t very big, just a little 7x14 ft addition tacked on to the garage. The walls were white and a patriotic border hung on the wall just under the ceiling. A huge antique desk/bookcase combo covered the west wall. There were two doors that led into my room, one on the north wall, which opened into the garage, which I never used, and one on the east wall that opened into the living dining room area. My day bed was on the north wall positioned between the desk and the garage door. It faced my TV which was under my lone widow. The window was almost parallel to my bed and took up three quarters of the south wall. On this particular evening it was letting in just enough of the late afternoon sun that I didn’t need to turn on the light.
While I was flipping through the channels, I paused on TBN, they were doing a segment on Kirk Cameron and he was going to give his Testimony of Salvation. Now, whenever I hear of a celebrity “getting saved” I’m always skeptical that they are truly saved or if they are making a PR statement. I was curious I wanted to see what he had to say. Little did I know that my curiosity would lead to a life changing revelation!
You see, I was raised in a Christian home, my dad was a missionary. I had been exposed to Bible stories, the concepts of sin, and the need of a savior at an early age. When I was five, I remember the church service going a little late. I asked my mom what was happening, she told me someone was getting saved. I misunderstood and thought she said mommy was getting saved and started to cry. When I realized that wasn’t what she said, I was embarrassed to admit that I had misunderstood her. So when she asked why I was crying, I told her I wanted to be saved… I remember praying a prayer but it really didn’t mean anything to me. When I was in my teens this started to bother me and I spoke to my mom about it. She prayed with me again, but I knew deep down inside nothing had changed.
I was so enthralled with Kirk Cameron’s testimony, actually before it was over he was preaching a sermon on how to lead someone to Christ, I never noticed how dark it was getting, the only light in my room was the flicker of the TV screen. The only sound in the room was Kirk’s voice and the still small voice speaking to my heart saying, “You’ve never done that. You’ve never really admitted that you are a sinner!” “But” my mind argued back “what will everybody say? I’m a missionary’s kid, I sing in the choir, I’m signed up for that soul winning class that starts on Saturday.” And the still small voice whispered back “Would you die and go to hell over what others think about you?” I barely noticed that the presentation was coming to an end, I was so involved in my own thoughts. As Kirk stared issuing an invitation, I switched the TV off and sank to my knees beside my bed and cried out to God that I was a sinner and in need of salvation. I remember the relief I felt knowing that I didn’t have to worry anymore about where I would go when I died.
I went out that night, to put in a job application, and for the first time in my life did not need any back ground noise to cover up my thoughts; I was finally at peace!
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Monday, June 29, 2009
State of the Family
A few days ago I wrote about my husband and I having a "State of the Family" meeting and today I am going to post the intro to my State of the Family book I am writing.
If you picked this book up in hopes that it will tell you a magic formula to get rid of all your problems, then I am sorry to disappoint you. There is no magic formula, just, hard work. I am going to give you the tools needed to make your work a little easier. In this book you will find some things that you may already know but I’ve tried to put something in here that will benefit everyone. Many of these things I had to discover the hard way. Like I mentioned earlier this is not a magic formula, but it is a formula. One that I hope will make life a little easier for you to navigate the ups and downs of marriage.
When many couples get married all they are thinking about is the love that they are feeling, they aren’t thinking about finances, they aren’t thinking about communication, they just know that they are never going to have any of the problems other couples have. The problems don’t come until they are a few years into their marriage, sometimes it’s after they start having children, or just when they notice money is getting tight, but eventually all couples go through hard times (even if you use this formula) but if you follow this formula it will help you navigate the rough spots a little easier.
How do I know this? Because this is my story, my husband and I got married during his last year of college and money was pretty tight, but we figured things would get better when he got a real job after college. However, as life has a way of happening, things happened that changed our plans.
I am a planner, and my husband is more of a happy go lucky fly by the seat of my pants kind of guy. He doesn’t like to plan ahead, he just take things one day at a time. In some aspects this is great, but I craved regulation and order. I wanted to sit down and talk about everything and plan everything out and that just wasn’t happening. When we had the money to go on a date, which wasn’t very often, we usually chose to do something fun, like going to the movies or playing mini golf. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy those kind of dates, I loved it and I had a wonderful time; but I came away from them craving a deeper connection with my husband. One day during my personal devotion time I was pondering what to do about this situation, I didn’t want to give up our fun date nights for talking, one I knew my Hubby would never go for it and two I enjoyed the fun things we did. So after throwing out several bad solutions, I had this idea, a monthly family business meeting and couples Bible Study. I had been watching TV earlier and the President had been giving his State of the Union Address and that gave me the name for my plan – A State of the Family Meeting. I could hardly wait for my husband to come home and spent the rest of the day perfecting my plan and how I would pitch it to my husband. When he came home I could not contain my excitement and jumped right in, he liked the idea and we planned our first meeting for the following week. With only a couple of exceptions we have managed to keep it up every month. It has not only brought us closer together as a couple, but has helped us manage our finances, and our time more efficiently. That is not to say that things magically got better for us and we never had any hardships again. What it really does is helps us keep the doors of communication open and gives us a chance to air anything that is on our mind without it ruining our fun dates, and yes we definitely still have those.
As I saw how much benefit our family received from this approach I thought of all the young couples that were just starting out and wondered how much better their relationships would be if they could benefit from us telling what we learned the hard way! But whether you are a young couple just starting out on this journey of life or if you’re an older couple floundering in the mistakes you’ve already made I hope this book will be a blessing to you and your family, and that you will find something in it that will make life a little easier!
Lydia J. Paasch
If you picked this book up in hopes that it will tell you a magic formula to get rid of all your problems, then I am sorry to disappoint you. There is no magic formula, just, hard work. I am going to give you the tools needed to make your work a little easier. In this book you will find some things that you may already know but I’ve tried to put something in here that will benefit everyone. Many of these things I had to discover the hard way. Like I mentioned earlier this is not a magic formula, but it is a formula. One that I hope will make life a little easier for you to navigate the ups and downs of marriage.
When many couples get married all they are thinking about is the love that they are feeling, they aren’t thinking about finances, they aren’t thinking about communication, they just know that they are never going to have any of the problems other couples have. The problems don’t come until they are a few years into their marriage, sometimes it’s after they start having children, or just when they notice money is getting tight, but eventually all couples go through hard times (even if you use this formula) but if you follow this formula it will help you navigate the rough spots a little easier.
How do I know this? Because this is my story, my husband and I got married during his last year of college and money was pretty tight, but we figured things would get better when he got a real job after college. However, as life has a way of happening, things happened that changed our plans.
I am a planner, and my husband is more of a happy go lucky fly by the seat of my pants kind of guy. He doesn’t like to plan ahead, he just take things one day at a time. In some aspects this is great, but I craved regulation and order. I wanted to sit down and talk about everything and plan everything out and that just wasn’t happening. When we had the money to go on a date, which wasn’t very often, we usually chose to do something fun, like going to the movies or playing mini golf. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy those kind of dates, I loved it and I had a wonderful time; but I came away from them craving a deeper connection with my husband. One day during my personal devotion time I was pondering what to do about this situation, I didn’t want to give up our fun date nights for talking, one I knew my Hubby would never go for it and two I enjoyed the fun things we did. So after throwing out several bad solutions, I had this idea, a monthly family business meeting and couples Bible Study. I had been watching TV earlier and the President had been giving his State of the Union Address and that gave me the name for my plan – A State of the Family Meeting. I could hardly wait for my husband to come home and spent the rest of the day perfecting my plan and how I would pitch it to my husband. When he came home I could not contain my excitement and jumped right in, he liked the idea and we planned our first meeting for the following week. With only a couple of exceptions we have managed to keep it up every month. It has not only brought us closer together as a couple, but has helped us manage our finances, and our time more efficiently. That is not to say that things magically got better for us and we never had any hardships again. What it really does is helps us keep the doors of communication open and gives us a chance to air anything that is on our mind without it ruining our fun dates, and yes we definitely still have those.
As I saw how much benefit our family received from this approach I thought of all the young couples that were just starting out and wondered how much better their relationships would be if they could benefit from us telling what we learned the hard way! But whether you are a young couple just starting out on this journey of life or if you’re an older couple floundering in the mistakes you’ve already made I hope this book will be a blessing to you and your family, and that you will find something in it that will make life a little easier!
Lydia J. Paasch
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Standing in the Gap...
Since Sunday is the busiest day of my week, my Sunday posts are going to be my thoughts on the sermon I heard in church.
Today is kind of difficult to choose which sermon to write about they were both extremely thought provoking. We had a missionary speak, on Sunday morning at our church; he and his family are going to Greenland. And our Youth Pastor spoke tonight, at our VBS Kick off, it was amazing.
But I think I'm going to write about the missionary's sermon, his message was on Ezekiel 22:30 And I sought for a man among them, that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I should not destroy it: but I found none.
His key points were:
God is looking for someone
• who is growing and learning
• from among them – not higher or lower than anyone else
God doesn’t need our help, but he wants us to help. Like we want our children to help us, not so much because we need their help, but because we want to teach them and communicate with them.
We need men to stand for truth and in service.
Service starts with one person standing up and saying “I’ll do it”. Service means surrender, and compassion. We need to have the right kind of compassion. Many people will weep over a hole in the sole of a child’s shoe, but do not cry over their lost souls.Others will send money to get drinking water to those in third world countries, but do not care enough to give to send someone to tell them about the Living Water. Though it is good to care about their physical needs we need to have the same concern for theire spiritual needs as well.
Truth does no good unless you know it and apply it to your life
• if they never hear it
• and if we don’t obey it
IT DOES NO GOOD!
Then he asked the question “Will God be able to find someone today?”
I was moved by the sermon, there has been a lot of growth in our church in the past few months and it is exciting to see people surrender their lives to the Lord, allow Him to lead them in His Will. My Prayer is that we will continue to see growth and draw closer to God over the coming months. I want to be someone that will stand in the gap and do whatever it is that God want’s me to do.
Today is kind of difficult to choose which sermon to write about they were both extremely thought provoking. We had a missionary speak, on Sunday morning at our church; he and his family are going to Greenland. And our Youth Pastor spoke tonight, at our VBS Kick off, it was amazing.
But I think I'm going to write about the missionary's sermon, his message was on Ezekiel 22:30 And I sought for a man among them, that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I should not destroy it: but I found none.
His key points were:
God is looking for someone
• who is growing and learning
• from among them – not higher or lower than anyone else
God doesn’t need our help, but he wants us to help. Like we want our children to help us, not so much because we need their help, but because we want to teach them and communicate with them.
We need men to stand for truth and in service.
Service starts with one person standing up and saying “I’ll do it”. Service means surrender, and compassion. We need to have the right kind of compassion. Many people will weep over a hole in the sole of a child’s shoe, but do not cry over their lost souls.Others will send money to get drinking water to those in third world countries, but do not care enough to give to send someone to tell them about the Living Water. Though it is good to care about their physical needs we need to have the same concern for theire spiritual needs as well.
Truth does no good unless you know it and apply it to your life
• if they never hear it
• and if we don’t obey it
IT DOES NO GOOD!
Then he asked the question “Will God be able to find someone today?”
I was moved by the sermon, there has been a lot of growth in our church in the past few months and it is exciting to see people surrender their lives to the Lord, allow Him to lead them in His Will. My Prayer is that we will continue to see growth and draw closer to God over the coming months. I want to be someone that will stand in the gap and do whatever it is that God want’s me to do.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
My little brother is getting married.
Last weekend my little brother and his girlfriend stopped by, when they came in they were acting all sad and hanging their heads trying to throw us off track.He hemmed and hawed and finally pulled out her hand to show us the ring. We all laughed and congratulated them. Then they told us we couldn't say anything to anyone or post it on Facebook until after church because they had friends that they had to tell personally... that was one of the longest days of my life I don't keep secrets well. I did ok I didn't tell anyone and I didn't explode either.
I'm so excited for them. I guess I'm a bit of a romantic. I love weddings and can't wait to help them with their wedding. I like organizing things like this and look forward to spending time with my new SIL in the upcoming weeks and months.
It's hard to believe my little brother is old enough to be married. He did find himself a keeper though and I think that they will be very happy together!
Last weekend my little brother and his girlfriend stopped by, when they came in they were acting all sad and hanging their heads trying to throw us off track.He hemmed and hawed and finally pulled out her hand to show us the ring. We all laughed and congratulated them. Then they told us we couldn't say anything to anyone or post it on Facebook until after church because they had friends that they had to tell personally... that was one of the longest days of my life I don't keep secrets well. I did ok I didn't tell anyone and I didn't explode either.
I'm so excited for them. I guess I'm a bit of a romantic. I love weddings and can't wait to help them with their wedding. I like organizing things like this and look forward to spending time with my new SIL in the upcoming weeks and months.
It's hard to believe my little brother is old enough to be married. He did find himself a keeper though and I think that they will be very happy together!
Friday
Yesterday was a busy day, I took DH to work, then the kids and I went shopping, if any one knows of a good way to keep two kids entertained while grocery shopping please let me know, I am always exhausted by the time we get done and head home. When we got home I put all the groceries away and started folding laundry.About 12 I made lunch for the kids and put them down for a nap, while they were napping I finished folding the laundry and got online to check my emails... I stayed online till it was time to take the kids to Granny's so that DH and I could go out on a semi-date.
We went to Rib Crib for supper ... dang that place is expensive, but the food was good and we enjoyed being able to talk to each other over dinner. When we got done there we went to the library to hold our Monthly State of the Family meeting. This is like a family business meeting that we try to hold once a month, we sit down and look over the finances together and make adjustment's for the month as needed, we also talk about concerns we have about the kids and what areas we need to work on as parents to make things work better. We also make out a schedule that cover different things we need to accomplish this month or things we would like to do, such as; date night, entertaining friends and next month's State of the Family.
Another thing we do is a small Bible Study where we discuss the things we have been learning from our personal devotions and set our goals for next month.
This has been a great help to our relationship and helped our communication.
After our meeting we went back to the In-laws' to pick up the kids, and ended up staying and watched Bride Wars with them, by the time that was over it was well past midnight and we went home and went to bed.
We went to Rib Crib for supper ... dang that place is expensive, but the food was good and we enjoyed being able to talk to each other over dinner. When we got done there we went to the library to hold our Monthly State of the Family meeting. This is like a family business meeting that we try to hold once a month, we sit down and look over the finances together and make adjustment's for the month as needed, we also talk about concerns we have about the kids and what areas we need to work on as parents to make things work better. We also make out a schedule that cover different things we need to accomplish this month or things we would like to do, such as; date night, entertaining friends and next month's State of the Family.
Another thing we do is a small Bible Study where we discuss the things we have been learning from our personal devotions and set our goals for next month.
This has been a great help to our relationship and helped our communication.
After our meeting we went back to the In-laws' to pick up the kids, and ended up staying and watched Bride Wars with them, by the time that was over it was well past midnight and we went home and went to bed.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
The Myserious Murder of Mr. Fuzzy
This is something that happened a few weeks ago, and I thought it would make a good Picture post. Think of it as a game of Clue!
It was Malachi...
in the bedroom...
with the Nail polish!!!
Luckily Mr. Fuzzy survived ... he has a few scars but is doing well.
(just a little FYI, if you ever need to get nail polish out of fabric Hydrogen Peroxide works the best, you can hardly see that spot on the floor any more!)
It was Malachi...
in the bedroom...
with the Nail polish!!!
Luckily Mr. Fuzzy survived ... he has a few scars but is doing well.
(just a little FYI, if you ever need to get nail polish out of fabric Hydrogen Peroxide works the best, you can hardly see that spot on the floor any more!)
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
My 3 Angels
All of my life all I ever wanted to be was a wife and mother. In September of 2003, I married my childhood sweetheart, Matthew Paasch. Nine months later we found out I was expecting, though not planned by us, God obviously has special plans for our daughter, for nine months later, after a perfect pregnancy, Mysia Lynn Paasch was born, I was overjoyed. And when, less than a year later, I found out I was pregnant again I was surprised, but excited. I knew having 2 children so close together would be a challenge, but I was prepared to take it on. We waited until Mysia's Birthday party to announce the pregnancy to the family. She wore a little t-shirt that Matt had made for her saying “I'm going to be a Big Sister” It was a blast watching the reaction on everyone's faces as they realized what we were announcing. But one week later I started spotting, and by the end of the day the bleeding was strong enough for me to be concerned, so Saturday morning I called the nurse on call and she contacted the OB... I had never met him, seeing we had to change doctors due to insurance. He told me to go to the ER, there they confirmed the fact that it did look like a miscarriage, but were careful not to make any definite statements and sent me to see my doctor on Monday. This was the start of a very unhappy relationship with me and my new OB. I knew of several people who had miscarried and that it wasn't an uncommon occurrence, but when it happens to you it is a very different story. I grieved my loss but was convinced that God was in control and He knew best, I took comfort in knowing that my baby was in heaven and I would see him or her when my journey here was over. The doctor told me to wait a month before trying to get pregnant again, but otherwise just continue as normal.
I had one period in between the miscarriage and my next pregnancy, I called the Doctor right away and made an appointment to go in and see him, on my way to the doctor's office I was in a minor collision. It wasn't anything serious, I was rear-ended, but there was no visible damage to the car. After waiting for the police to show up I went on to my doctor's appointment, he did the exam, I told him about the wreck but he said it shouldn't affect the baby any. Well, what shouldn't happen and what sometimes does are two different things, later that week I started spotting and bleeding again. Why do these things always happen after hours? Anyway I called the nurse on call and she said to go to the ER because they wanted to be sure it wasn't an ectopic pregnancy. They didn't find anything wrong said I might be miscarrying again but they couldn't be sure, and told me to go see my doc the next day. I went to see the doctor he said I might be miscarrying, but sometimes women will bleed a little during pregnancy and it not hurt the baby either. I went home to rest before I had to pick up my daughter from her grandma's. I lay down and took a nap, when I woke up I was cramping, my first thought was “I'm just uncomfortable because I slept too long and need to go to the bathroom.” I went and picked up my daughter and by the time I got home was doubling over in pain, I took some Tylenol and lay on the couch most of the evening, the pain wasn't unbearable with the medication it just made me uncomfortable, I remember thinking that this felt an awful lot like mini contractions. Around 10 I got up to go to the bathroom and get ready for bed and found I had passed the baby. It looked just like the pictures just really tiny, in it's bag of waters, I had my husband take a picture. I called the doctor the next morning and he said to go ahead and come in. I took Mysia to my mom's and then went to the doctor's. I remember the whole way there, it seemed, the radio station played nothing but songs about heaven, I was crying so much I could hardly see to drive. I gave my baby to the doc and they sent it to the lab for testing to see if anything was wrong with it. I went back to my mom's and spent the day with her I put on a CD and played “Jesus has a Rocking Chair” for hours while I curled up on the couch and cried. After that I tried to put it behind me, when anybody asked I was fine, but deep inside I wasn't I was angry with God, I didn't want to hear one more time how my baby was better off. I ached inside. I was mad that God had allowed me to get pregnant in the first place if he was just going to take my baby from me. What purpose did that serve? I closed myself off, I tried not to feel, it hurt too much. Slowly I began to realize that by not letting myself feel the pain I was also not allowing myself to feel joy. I was depressed.
About 2 months into this, I found out I was once again pregnant, with the last pregnancy we had announced it right away and I had had the misfortune of people hearing about the pregnancy but not about our loss, so this time I decided not to tell anyone. I didn't even call the doctor until I was about 8 weeks along, the weekend before my appointment I received a phone call from my mother giving me some very bad news, (I can't go into detail here, but it was bad enough it put me on an emotional roller coaster that still hasn't completely stopped). I went to the doctor he looked at me through a box of progesterone pills at me and said take these they may help. And set me up to come in every week sand have blood drawn so they could monitor my blood levels. I woke up in the middle of the night on Friday and I had bleed quite a bit, but then on Saturday nothing happened and I had no more bleeding so I was hopeful that this baby would survive. Unfortunately, it did not. A couple of weeks later I started bleeding profusely (on a Friday night) by this time I knew the routine and decided to forgo the ER visit and just call my Doc on Monday. I had indeed miscarried again, the doctor shrugged and said, “these things happen” and walked out. I was furious... I had stared doing my own research and had found that I had three things in my family history that could have caused the miscarriages and he had not checked to see if I had even one of these, and was very unconcerned.
I went to see my family doctor a few weeks later and she agreed to run the tests as well as refer me to a different OB. It was a relief to me to see someone start to care and try to do something to help...and though the tests revealed nothing, at least they had tried. A few months later I was pregnant again, this time I carried to term and delivered a beautiful baby boy. He did give us a little scare by wrapping the cord around his neck twice. I'm grateful to God for the 2 children that He has given me, and thought I still don't know why He took the other three from me, I trust that his way is best and know I will see them again in heaven. I will always miss them, my precious Angel Babies!
I had one period in between the miscarriage and my next pregnancy, I called the Doctor right away and made an appointment to go in and see him, on my way to the doctor's office I was in a minor collision. It wasn't anything serious, I was rear-ended, but there was no visible damage to the car. After waiting for the police to show up I went on to my doctor's appointment, he did the exam, I told him about the wreck but he said it shouldn't affect the baby any. Well, what shouldn't happen and what sometimes does are two different things, later that week I started spotting and bleeding again. Why do these things always happen after hours? Anyway I called the nurse on call and she said to go to the ER because they wanted to be sure it wasn't an ectopic pregnancy. They didn't find anything wrong said I might be miscarrying again but they couldn't be sure, and told me to go see my doc the next day. I went to see the doctor he said I might be miscarrying, but sometimes women will bleed a little during pregnancy and it not hurt the baby either. I went home to rest before I had to pick up my daughter from her grandma's. I lay down and took a nap, when I woke up I was cramping, my first thought was “I'm just uncomfortable because I slept too long and need to go to the bathroom.” I went and picked up my daughter and by the time I got home was doubling over in pain, I took some Tylenol and lay on the couch most of the evening, the pain wasn't unbearable with the medication it just made me uncomfortable, I remember thinking that this felt an awful lot like mini contractions. Around 10 I got up to go to the bathroom and get ready for bed and found I had passed the baby. It looked just like the pictures just really tiny, in it's bag of waters, I had my husband take a picture. I called the doctor the next morning and he said to go ahead and come in. I took Mysia to my mom's and then went to the doctor's. I remember the whole way there, it seemed, the radio station played nothing but songs about heaven, I was crying so much I could hardly see to drive. I gave my baby to the doc and they sent it to the lab for testing to see if anything was wrong with it. I went back to my mom's and spent the day with her I put on a CD and played “Jesus has a Rocking Chair” for hours while I curled up on the couch and cried. After that I tried to put it behind me, when anybody asked I was fine, but deep inside I wasn't I was angry with God, I didn't want to hear one more time how my baby was better off. I ached inside. I was mad that God had allowed me to get pregnant in the first place if he was just going to take my baby from me. What purpose did that serve? I closed myself off, I tried not to feel, it hurt too much. Slowly I began to realize that by not letting myself feel the pain I was also not allowing myself to feel joy. I was depressed.
About 2 months into this, I found out I was once again pregnant, with the last pregnancy we had announced it right away and I had had the misfortune of people hearing about the pregnancy but not about our loss, so this time I decided not to tell anyone. I didn't even call the doctor until I was about 8 weeks along, the weekend before my appointment I received a phone call from my mother giving me some very bad news, (I can't go into detail here, but it was bad enough it put me on an emotional roller coaster that still hasn't completely stopped). I went to the doctor he looked at me through a box of progesterone pills at me and said take these they may help. And set me up to come in every week sand have blood drawn so they could monitor my blood levels. I woke up in the middle of the night on Friday and I had bleed quite a bit, but then on Saturday nothing happened and I had no more bleeding so I was hopeful that this baby would survive. Unfortunately, it did not. A couple of weeks later I started bleeding profusely (on a Friday night) by this time I knew the routine and decided to forgo the ER visit and just call my Doc on Monday. I had indeed miscarried again, the doctor shrugged and said, “these things happen” and walked out. I was furious... I had stared doing my own research and had found that I had three things in my family history that could have caused the miscarriages and he had not checked to see if I had even one of these, and was very unconcerned.
I went to see my family doctor a few weeks later and she agreed to run the tests as well as refer me to a different OB. It was a relief to me to see someone start to care and try to do something to help...and though the tests revealed nothing, at least they had tried. A few months later I was pregnant again, this time I carried to term and delivered a beautiful baby boy. He did give us a little scare by wrapping the cord around his neck twice. I'm grateful to God for the 2 children that He has given me, and thought I still don't know why He took the other three from me, I trust that his way is best and know I will see them again in heaven. I will always miss them, my precious Angel Babies!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
The Emperor’s Club Again
I wanted to get my Husband's opinion on the the Emperor’s Club, so we borrowed it from the library and watched together last night, after we put the kids to bed. I also wondered if a second viewing would change my opinion of the film. I found that my opinion of the film did not change and my DH agreed with me. This film set out to prove that Character is more important than Financial Success. I thought about it all morning and as I was driving to class this morning the thought came to me. For those of you who believe that morals are relative, who would you rather work for? Segwick, with his “whatever-it-takes-to-get-to-the-top” attitude or Mr. Hundert, with his concern for his students.
I would go with Mr. Hundert every time. Why? Because, I’ve seen firsthand what Segwick can do to the people who work for him. If it means laying of the person who makes the most money no matter how loyal or efficient that person has been then he will do it, to save money, to advance himself, whatever it takes and he doesn’t care who he hurts in the mean time. To be honest this is exactly what Corporate America has become, in years past if you work hard and were loyal to a company, they returned the favor and when times got tough your job was more secure than the person who just got hired. Since the advent of Moral Relativism, we now have a bunch of Segwicks running our nation and our businesses, and all they see is the bottom line and they will do whatever it takes to make the most profit.
My husband is a prime example of this, he has worked for accompany for 8 years, slowly working his way up. This January because of the bad economy the company laid off over 100 people, my husband was one of them. Why? Because of his seniority, he made more than anyone else in the department. It had nothing to do with his performance or capabilities, which they proved by hiring him back at a lower paying position less than 8 weeks later, an option he had no choice but to take because if he declined the position he would no longer be eligible for unemployment, and we have to eat. Then to make matters worse, when he had been back a few weeks, they promote someone who had been with the company only a few months to his old position. This kind of treatment makes me furious… I want to march myself to his bosses office and demand an answer as to why… I know I wouldn’t get it, at least not the real one! But this is what happens when morals are relative and “Segwick” is in charge!
I would go with Mr. Hundert every time. Why? Because, I’ve seen firsthand what Segwick can do to the people who work for him. If it means laying of the person who makes the most money no matter how loyal or efficient that person has been then he will do it, to save money, to advance himself, whatever it takes and he doesn’t care who he hurts in the mean time. To be honest this is exactly what Corporate America has become, in years past if you work hard and were loyal to a company, they returned the favor and when times got tough your job was more secure than the person who just got hired. Since the advent of Moral Relativism, we now have a bunch of Segwicks running our nation and our businesses, and all they see is the bottom line and they will do whatever it takes to make the most profit.
My husband is a prime example of this, he has worked for accompany for 8 years, slowly working his way up. This January because of the bad economy the company laid off over 100 people, my husband was one of them. Why? Because of his seniority, he made more than anyone else in the department. It had nothing to do with his performance or capabilities, which they proved by hiring him back at a lower paying position less than 8 weeks later, an option he had no choice but to take because if he declined the position he would no longer be eligible for unemployment, and we have to eat. Then to make matters worse, when he had been back a few weeks, they promote someone who had been with the company only a few months to his old position. This kind of treatment makes me furious… I want to march myself to his bosses office and demand an answer as to why… I know I wouldn’t get it, at least not the real one! But this is what happens when morals are relative and “Segwick” is in charge!
Monday, June 22, 2009
A Poem of Praise!
The sun you have given us to light the day.
Your Son you have given us to show the way.
For this I praise you Adoni
You are the God who see's
You see even me
you are the God who gives, good and perfect gifts
Not always what I want but always what I need
Jaweh, you are the God that sees
You send the birds to sing
make the flowers and trees to bloom
like an Artist with his paintbrush you paint a scene of peace!
you remind me that you care
even for the sparrow,
and show me that you care for even me.
(Ok this is probably not my best poem ever, but it is just some thoughts I had while I was sitting on campus in between classes)
Your Son you have given us to show the way.
For this I praise you Adoni
You are the God who see's
You see even me
you are the God who gives, good and perfect gifts
Not always what I want but always what I need
Jaweh, you are the God that sees
You send the birds to sing
make the flowers and trees to bloom
like an Artist with his paintbrush you paint a scene of peace!
you remind me that you care
even for the sparrow,
and show me that you care for even me.
(Ok this is probably not my best poem ever, but it is just some thoughts I had while I was sitting on campus in between classes)
Fathers Day
Father’s Day
Yesterday was Father’s Day and it got me to thinking about fathers and their influence on our lives. We are all shaped by our fathers, whether they were an active participant in our lives or not. Some are there physically, but are not there emotionally. Others are not there at all leaving a void in our lives. And then there are those fathers that are both physically and emotionally present. They pay attention to all of our needs and when they make a mistake they are able to admit it and apologize for it.
In my case my dad was there and he was involved in my life for the most part. Though when I turned 13 he turned most of my care over to my mother, I always felt like he distanced himself from me at the most critical time in my development. I spent most of my teen years trying to gain his approval and love. He was very critical of everything I did and nothing I did was ever good enough. I still feel the effects of that today, anything less than 100% is not good enough, one mistake is one mistake too many. It has shaped me into the person I am today, though at times I am insecure and will be too hard on myself. I realize that it has also made me an incredibly hard worker, I don’t settle for ok work, I give my best to everything I do.
So thanks Dad for making in to the strong, determined person I am today!
Yesterday was Father’s Day and it got me to thinking about fathers and their influence on our lives. We are all shaped by our fathers, whether they were an active participant in our lives or not. Some are there physically, but are not there emotionally. Others are not there at all leaving a void in our lives. And then there are those fathers that are both physically and emotionally present. They pay attention to all of our needs and when they make a mistake they are able to admit it and apologize for it.
In my case my dad was there and he was involved in my life for the most part. Though when I turned 13 he turned most of my care over to my mother, I always felt like he distanced himself from me at the most critical time in my development. I spent most of my teen years trying to gain his approval and love. He was very critical of everything I did and nothing I did was ever good enough. I still feel the effects of that today, anything less than 100% is not good enough, one mistake is one mistake too many. It has shaped me into the person I am today, though at times I am insecure and will be too hard on myself. I realize that it has also made me an incredibly hard worker, I don’t settle for ok work, I give my best to everything I do.
So thanks Dad for making in to the strong, determined person I am today!
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Reflection on "Soup"
I thought this reading was very interesting and entertaining. The man in the story sounds a lot like how I would run a restaurant... get in, order your food, take your order and get out. nice and simple, no waiting 20 minutes while somebody try's to make up their mind or try's to order for 5 other people over a cell. Reading this story actually brought flashbacks of when I worked at Subway... a line out the door during a lunch rush and some idiot is talking on their cell phone and trying to order at the same time. There were so many times I wanted to put a sign up that said "no Cellphone use past this point" and then refuse to take their order if they didn't obey the rules. But unfortunately my boss wouldn't go for that, so I had to make do with giving them dirty looks behind their backs.
The observations and descriptions are excellent in this story, you can practically smell the delicious soups and feel the crispness in the air as people stand silently in line waiting for their turn to receive some of the soup and when they do they hurry on their normal way. The writer helps us to feel the soup maker's agitation with those who dare to mess up his routine. He is a perfectionist and perhaps has a little OCD.
The observations and descriptions are excellent in this story, you can practically smell the delicious soups and feel the crispness in the air as people stand silently in line waiting for their turn to receive some of the soup and when they do they hurry on their normal way. The writer helps us to feel the soup maker's agitation with those who dare to mess up his routine. He is a perfectionist and perhaps has a little OCD.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
The Quartet
Oh, how nice of you to stop by. Sorry I can't offer you a seat in the living room it's been trasformed into a music studio for the morning. Just one of the joys of being married to a musician!
Here, let me introduce you to the guys, the bass singer in my husband, Matt, then, there's the lead singer and that is his brother, Sam, the High tenor is Noah and the baritone is Greg. They make up the Steppin' Out Quartet, the name came out of the fact that they are stepping out by faith in starting this group. My husband has been interested in Southern Gospel Music since he was a young teen and it has been his dream to have his own SG Quartet and sing professionally! Over the last year he has come in contact with these 3 other guys that share his passion and they meet once a week to practice, at our house. The original idea being that they would practice in the garage so that I could do what I need to in the house and not be disturbed. Yeah, the only problem with that is; there is only 4-6 weeks a year that the garage is actually comfortable enough for them to be out there for several hours, so most weeks they end up turning my living room into a sound studio.
I think the cutest thing is watching my son trying to imitate his daddy and grabbing the mics and trying to sing along. He is getting to where he knows most of the songs well enough he can sing along.
Well, I got to run! We're going out to some friend's house for a cookout. If you get a chance come on out to Hillside Baptist church on July 5th, we'll be having a cook out and fireworks, and the guys will be preforming at as well!
Friday, June 19, 2009
A Down Day
Today was a little bit of a down day for me. I had been having trouble getting to bed on time the last couple of days and have been feeling run down. But I went about my normal routine, got up early and went and donated plasma before taking my husband to work. Fridays are my shopping day, so we, the kids and I, headed to Wal-Mart, nothing out of the ordinary happened while we were at the store, except DD put a sucker in her pocket when mom wasn't looking and almost walked out of the store with it, lucky I caught it before we left. Why does she try these things? When we got home I put the groceries away and then sat down to fill out the forms to get them enrolled in the new daycare.
I could not keep my eyes open, I finally fed the kids lunch and put them down for their naps, while they were napping, I decided to nap a little too. I slept for 2 hours!!! But I was still tired when I woke up, stupid sales people. I took care of the kids and the little boy I babysit until it was time to go pick up DH from work. DH worked some over-time and so I ran the papers to the day care before I went to pick him up.
Supper was Club Salads, and I had just sat down with mine when my SIL called she never calls me so I figured all that I was in trouble, as it turned out her DH, my BIL was at a ballgame and she was bored so she called to chat. We talked for over an hour, which is very unusual for us, but it was good I enjoyed sharing with her.
By the time I returned to the living room the kids and my DH were done eating and ready to start getting ready for bed. We decided to quickly put together the gifts that we are giving our Dad's for Father's Day. We put the kids to bed. I had to write a blog post for class so I decided to finish it up real quick. I'm falling asleep as I write this so I think I will close for now and head to bed!
Nighty Night!
I could not keep my eyes open, I finally fed the kids lunch and put them down for their naps, while they were napping, I decided to nap a little too. I slept for 2 hours!!! But I was still tired when I woke up, stupid sales people. I took care of the kids and the little boy I babysit until it was time to go pick up DH from work. DH worked some over-time and so I ran the papers to the day care before I went to pick him up.
Supper was Club Salads, and I had just sat down with mine when my SIL called she never calls me so I figured all that I was in trouble, as it turned out her DH, my BIL was at a ballgame and she was bored so she called to chat. We talked for over an hour, which is very unusual for us, but it was good I enjoyed sharing with her.
By the time I returned to the living room the kids and my DH were done eating and ready to start getting ready for bed. We decided to quickly put together the gifts that we are giving our Dad's for Father's Day. We put the kids to bed. I had to write a blog post for class so I decided to finish it up real quick. I'm falling asleep as I write this so I think I will close for now and head to bed!
Nighty Night!
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Daycare!
Daycares
Today I’m going to rant a little. The last two weeks my kids have been in daycare for the first time, they’ve been around other kids, at church and at home, but this is the first time they have been to in an official Daycare setting. They are doing well, my son cried everyday when I dropped him off for the first week, (that was hard on mom) but the second week he took his stuffed pig with him and has been fine. But I have problem, the director of the day care looks very, unkept. Now, I run an in-home-day care (part time) and I understand that child care is messy work and you can’t wear professional clothing, such as suits or dressy clothes, but seriously try and at least look clean. Messy, greasy hair and torn, ragged, and dirty clothing are NOT appropriate in any circumstances! Add to this the fact that they are already raising our rates and the teachers are not getting paid and you have a situation that makes me very uncomfortable. Luckily, when I called another daycare closer to my house, they had 2 openings! I went by last night to pick up the paperwork to get the kids enrolled and was pleasantly impressed. A clean, casually dressed, director met me in a large, open, play area. She told me that my daughter would be learning and doing seatwork similar to what she would do in Kindergarten, she took me around and introduced me to the teachers. All the rooms were bright and clean, with children’s art work adorning the walls. The only catch that I saw, was that they have to be enrolled full time, I’m on state assistance and I am only approved for 4 days, since those are the days I have classes, but when I compared the prices the daycare they are at now is charging the same amount for 4 days as they charge for 5! I am sold! This means that, since I am paying for five days I can send them to daycare on Friday, my day off from classes, if I need to, and since my husband has some vacation time he needs to use up, it looks like we might have some Date “Days” on Fridays now! That is something to look forward to, not to mention that I would be way more comfortable with the care my children are receiving and I won’t waste gas driving clear across town 4 times a day, the new daycare is walking distance from my home!
Now my only concern is finding a part-time job during the semester break so that I won’t have to pay extra to keep them enrolled! If anyone hears of something let me know!
Today I’m going to rant a little. The last two weeks my kids have been in daycare for the first time, they’ve been around other kids, at church and at home, but this is the first time they have been to in an official Daycare setting. They are doing well, my son cried everyday when I dropped him off for the first week, (that was hard on mom) but the second week he took his stuffed pig with him and has been fine. But I have problem, the director of the day care looks very, unkept. Now, I run an in-home-day care (part time) and I understand that child care is messy work and you can’t wear professional clothing, such as suits or dressy clothes, but seriously try and at least look clean. Messy, greasy hair and torn, ragged, and dirty clothing are NOT appropriate in any circumstances! Add to this the fact that they are already raising our rates and the teachers are not getting paid and you have a situation that makes me very uncomfortable. Luckily, when I called another daycare closer to my house, they had 2 openings! I went by last night to pick up the paperwork to get the kids enrolled and was pleasantly impressed. A clean, casually dressed, director met me in a large, open, play area. She told me that my daughter would be learning and doing seatwork similar to what she would do in Kindergarten, she took me around and introduced me to the teachers. All the rooms were bright and clean, with children’s art work adorning the walls. The only catch that I saw, was that they have to be enrolled full time, I’m on state assistance and I am only approved for 4 days, since those are the days I have classes, but when I compared the prices the daycare they are at now is charging the same amount for 4 days as they charge for 5! I am sold! This means that, since I am paying for five days I can send them to daycare on Friday, my day off from classes, if I need to, and since my husband has some vacation time he needs to use up, it looks like we might have some Date “Days” on Fridays now! That is something to look forward to, not to mention that I would be way more comfortable with the care my children are receiving and I won’t waste gas driving clear across town 4 times a day, the new daycare is walking distance from my home!
Now my only concern is finding a part-time job during the semester break so that I won’t have to pay extra to keep them enrolled! If anyone hears of something let me know!
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Leslie
This is a chapter out of my book Jamie's Bride.
Leslie sighed, as she snuggled into Jamie’s arms. He reached up and brushed her curls from her eyes and kissed her tenderly. “I love you Leslie Ann Jamison!” he murmured into her neck pulling her closer to him as if he couldn’t get her close enough.
Leslie stirred, and slowly the dream faded away, and reality intruded on her consciousness once more. She was alone. She stretched slowly trying to ease her aching muscles, her hand unconsciously rubbing her expanding stomach. They were at it again, the little ones inside her were tumbling and playing together. Once again she wished that Jamie were there to share it with her and tears rolled down her cheeks as she remembered the accident that had claimed Jamie’s life. She shook her head, she couldn’t let herself think of her loss, she would never quit crying if she did that. “Think of the good times” she reminded herself sternly. Fortunately for her, one, or both, of the twins chose that moment to kick her bladder. She quickly sat up, well as quickly as she could for being eight and a half months pregnant, and waddled to the bathroom thinking “Maybe it’s a good thing Jamie can’t see me now. I feel like a huge whale! He’d probably say I was fat or something and then we’d have a huge fight!”
Leslie turned on the radio more to drowned out her own thoughts than anything, even thoughts of having a fight with her husband threatened to drowned her in sadness. If it hadn’t been for the babies she probably would have let herself drowned in her grief, but as it was she forced herself to go through her daily routine. A shower, some breakfast, usually orange juice and some scrambled eggs, then off to her job at the embassy, where she worked as a secretary.
She turned on the small fan sitting on her kitchen table, it was only 6:30 and yet the apartment was already as hot as a sauna, Barcelona in June was very hot, and it felt ten times hotter to Leslie in her advanced stage of pregnancy, once again she wished that she could afford an apartment with an air conditioner. But with the doctor bills and all the baby things she had to buy, and saving up for maternity leave she just couldn’t do it, maybe after the babies were born. She glanced at the clock and saw she must hurry if she was going to catch the tram that would take her to the American Embassy, she needed to be there early today, because she had a doctor’s appointment this afternoon and would have to leave the office a little early. Major Applegate was very understanding about her situation, she didn’t know of anyone else who would have hired her, without experience and 4 ½ months pregnant, with twins, but he did and she did not want to take advantage of his kindness. She worked harder than any other secretary in the Embassy trying to prove that she was worth the risk he had taken in hiring her. The Major and his wife were very kind people and looked after Leslie as if she were their own daughter, always trying to help wherever they could, but Leslie was fiercely independent and determined to make it on her own. No one at the Embassy knew much about Leslie’s past just that she was a widow of a soldier, there were many rumors as to how he died. Popular belief had it that he had been killed in the fighting in Iraq or Afghanistan. Leslie didn’t dispute it, she was happy to let them believe what they wanted as long as they left her alone and didn’t dig to deep into her past.
Leslie’s walk to the trolley stop was pleasant she smiled and waved to the neighborhood grocer and baker, that was the great thing about living away from the American community, she was able to experience the culture first hand. Of course, last week when she ended up buying a bag of corn meal instead of the bag of tortilla chips she wanted it was less than amusing, but most of the time she enjoyed the experience.
The trolley stopped one block away from the Embassy so Leslie walked the rest of the way to the guard shack and handed the guard her passport who looked at it and said “Hello Analiese, how are you doing today?”
Leslie sighed, as she snuggled into Jamie’s arms. He reached up and brushed her curls from her eyes and kissed her tenderly. “I love you Leslie Ann Jamison!” he murmured into her neck pulling her closer to him as if he couldn’t get her close enough.
Leslie stirred, and slowly the dream faded away, and reality intruded on her consciousness once more. She was alone. She stretched slowly trying to ease her aching muscles, her hand unconsciously rubbing her expanding stomach. They were at it again, the little ones inside her were tumbling and playing together. Once again she wished that Jamie were there to share it with her and tears rolled down her cheeks as she remembered the accident that had claimed Jamie’s life. She shook her head, she couldn’t let herself think of her loss, she would never quit crying if she did that. “Think of the good times” she reminded herself sternly. Fortunately for her, one, or both, of the twins chose that moment to kick her bladder. She quickly sat up, well as quickly as she could for being eight and a half months pregnant, and waddled to the bathroom thinking “Maybe it’s a good thing Jamie can’t see me now. I feel like a huge whale! He’d probably say I was fat or something and then we’d have a huge fight!”
Leslie turned on the radio more to drowned out her own thoughts than anything, even thoughts of having a fight with her husband threatened to drowned her in sadness. If it hadn’t been for the babies she probably would have let herself drowned in her grief, but as it was she forced herself to go through her daily routine. A shower, some breakfast, usually orange juice and some scrambled eggs, then off to her job at the embassy, where she worked as a secretary.
She turned on the small fan sitting on her kitchen table, it was only 6:30 and yet the apartment was already as hot as a sauna, Barcelona in June was very hot, and it felt ten times hotter to Leslie in her advanced stage of pregnancy, once again she wished that she could afford an apartment with an air conditioner. But with the doctor bills and all the baby things she had to buy, and saving up for maternity leave she just couldn’t do it, maybe after the babies were born. She glanced at the clock and saw she must hurry if she was going to catch the tram that would take her to the American Embassy, she needed to be there early today, because she had a doctor’s appointment this afternoon and would have to leave the office a little early. Major Applegate was very understanding about her situation, she didn’t know of anyone else who would have hired her, without experience and 4 ½ months pregnant, with twins, but he did and she did not want to take advantage of his kindness. She worked harder than any other secretary in the Embassy trying to prove that she was worth the risk he had taken in hiring her. The Major and his wife were very kind people and looked after Leslie as if she were their own daughter, always trying to help wherever they could, but Leslie was fiercely independent and determined to make it on her own. No one at the Embassy knew much about Leslie’s past just that she was a widow of a soldier, there were many rumors as to how he died. Popular belief had it that he had been killed in the fighting in Iraq or Afghanistan. Leslie didn’t dispute it, she was happy to let them believe what they wanted as long as they left her alone and didn’t dig to deep into her past.
Leslie’s walk to the trolley stop was pleasant she smiled and waved to the neighborhood grocer and baker, that was the great thing about living away from the American community, she was able to experience the culture first hand. Of course, last week when she ended up buying a bag of corn meal instead of the bag of tortilla chips she wanted it was less than amusing, but most of the time she enjoyed the experience.
The trolley stopped one block away from the Embassy so Leslie walked the rest of the way to the guard shack and handed the guard her passport who looked at it and said “Hello Analiese, how are you doing today?”
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
A little bit about me!
I just realized I don't have any information about myself on here and thought that I should tell a little about myself.
I'm an oldest child. I have five younger siblings, two sisters and three brothers. My parents were missionaries so I was raised in Germany. I had been homeschooled prior to moving to Germany, but since homeschooling is illegal in Germany my parents put me in public school there. As the oldest my parents expected me to set an example for my siblings, I took my studies seriously and made good grades, but as a girl I was not expected to go to college. I can remember my dad telling me, as we were looking at college materials, that I really shouldn’t get to into choosing a career and just focus on being a wife and mother. At that time, I remember laughing and thinking how little my dad really knew me, because I was the furthest thing from a “career-woman”, all I wanted to be was a wife and mother. Eventually I decided since I didn’t really have any idea what I wanted to get an education for I would not to go to college and waste my parents money on my Mrs. Degree, I had been looking at Bible colleges and that is a running joke that girls go to college to get married and get their Mrs.
At the ripe old age of 19 I decided that I wanted to move back to the States, so after much convincing I moved an ocean away from my parents, got a job working at a daycare and moved into my own apartment. I worked in daycare and fast food until after I got married and was expecting my daughter, at which time I became a stay at home mom and sometimes babysitter for some of my friends. When my daughter was a year old I found out I was expecting again, unfortunately I miscarried that baby, as well as two more pregnancies that year, I might write more about that later. During that time I started babysitting regularly for a couple of families. In order to keep busy and save us some money I enrolled in H&R Block’s tax course in September of 2006. I did well in the course and enjoyed the learning experience. I started working for Block in January of ’07 and have worked there the last three tax seasons.
The experience of working in the tax office made me realize how much I enjoy working with numbers and helping people make sound financial decisions, but I still didn’t think I needed college. I figured with my hands on experience doing taxes for Block I would be able to find a decent job if I needed to. This January I found out how wrong I was about that. My husband and the lady I was babysitting for were both laid off on the same day. I was fortunate that it happened during tax season and I did have a job with Block at the time, but since I knew it was seasonal I started putting out applications and resumes. Most companies did not consider tax preparation enough experience to hire me. With two little ones at home now, I had given birth to my son in September of ’07, I was starting to panic. Fortunately, Bass Pro rehired my husband, he was called back to a lower position than the one he was let go from, but it was a job. By this time I had started looking into going to college, it took a lot of prayer, but with the encouragement of my family and friends I felt that this was where God was leading me. I applied for financial aid and got it, one hurdle down. I enrolled in OTC, applied for state assistance with childcare, got that too, second and third hurdles down. Slowly but surely God removed every obstacle in the way of me going to school, and here I am, every class that I was worried about taking this semester has been a breeze and I am excited that I have the opportunity to go to school. I am working towards two majors, Accounting and Business Management. Someday, I would like to open my own accounting and financial consulting business and be able to work and homeschool my kids at the same time. It is not easy, by any means, but it is doable and I keep reminding myself I just have to get through today. Tomorrow I can worry about tomorrow.
I'm an oldest child. I have five younger siblings, two sisters and three brothers. My parents were missionaries so I was raised in Germany. I had been homeschooled prior to moving to Germany, but since homeschooling is illegal in Germany my parents put me in public school there. As the oldest my parents expected me to set an example for my siblings, I took my studies seriously and made good grades, but as a girl I was not expected to go to college. I can remember my dad telling me, as we were looking at college materials, that I really shouldn’t get to into choosing a career and just focus on being a wife and mother. At that time, I remember laughing and thinking how little my dad really knew me, because I was the furthest thing from a “career-woman”, all I wanted to be was a wife and mother. Eventually I decided since I didn’t really have any idea what I wanted to get an education for I would not to go to college and waste my parents money on my Mrs. Degree, I had been looking at Bible colleges and that is a running joke that girls go to college to get married and get their Mrs.
At the ripe old age of 19 I decided that I wanted to move back to the States, so after much convincing I moved an ocean away from my parents, got a job working at a daycare and moved into my own apartment. I worked in daycare and fast food until after I got married and was expecting my daughter, at which time I became a stay at home mom and sometimes babysitter for some of my friends. When my daughter was a year old I found out I was expecting again, unfortunately I miscarried that baby, as well as two more pregnancies that year, I might write more about that later. During that time I started babysitting regularly for a couple of families. In order to keep busy and save us some money I enrolled in H&R Block’s tax course in September of 2006. I did well in the course and enjoyed the learning experience. I started working for Block in January of ’07 and have worked there the last three tax seasons.
The experience of working in the tax office made me realize how much I enjoy working with numbers and helping people make sound financial decisions, but I still didn’t think I needed college. I figured with my hands on experience doing taxes for Block I would be able to find a decent job if I needed to. This January I found out how wrong I was about that. My husband and the lady I was babysitting for were both laid off on the same day. I was fortunate that it happened during tax season and I did have a job with Block at the time, but since I knew it was seasonal I started putting out applications and resumes. Most companies did not consider tax preparation enough experience to hire me. With two little ones at home now, I had given birth to my son in September of ’07, I was starting to panic. Fortunately, Bass Pro rehired my husband, he was called back to a lower position than the one he was let go from, but it was a job. By this time I had started looking into going to college, it took a lot of prayer, but with the encouragement of my family and friends I felt that this was where God was leading me. I applied for financial aid and got it, one hurdle down. I enrolled in OTC, applied for state assistance with childcare, got that too, second and third hurdles down. Slowly but surely God removed every obstacle in the way of me going to school, and here I am, every class that I was worried about taking this semester has been a breeze and I am excited that I have the opportunity to go to school. I am working towards two majors, Accounting and Business Management. Someday, I would like to open my own accounting and financial consulting business and be able to work and homeschool my kids at the same time. It is not easy, by any means, but it is doable and I keep reminding myself I just have to get through today. Tomorrow I can worry about tomorrow.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Are Values Relative?
My English class watched the Emperor’s Club today, it was an interesting film but the discussion that it sparked afterwards was even more interesting. It seemed that most people in the class were of the opinion that right and wrong are, for the most part, relative. Relative to whether or not it hurts someone, or whether you are a successful person because of or in spite of what you do.
I do not share this opinion, I think that there is an absolute standard of right and wrong. Mr. Hundert said something to the effect that character is what defines a man. Character being the ability to define the difference between right and wrong and choose the right thing to do. Mr. Hundert tells Segwick that he had failed him as a teacher, after discovering that Segwick had cheated once again at the competition. Many in the class thought that because Segwick was wealthy business man and politician Mr Hundert was successful at his job, the only thing I can think of is a verse in the Bible “For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?” Mark 8:36 (KJV)
This is not the only instance where the Bible talks about the difference in being financially successful and being a person of integrity, but it is the first one that came to mind. I think that Mr. Hundert was right he failed him in two areas. The first was when he changed Segwick’s grade to allow him to take part in the competition and a second time when he failed to call attention to his cheating. The reason I say this is because when Mr. Hundert confronts Segwick about the cheating, Segwick challenges him and asks why he didn’t disqualify him for cheating and if his father’s position had anything to do with his decision not to. Mr. Hundert says no, but Segwick knows the truth and that seems to be a pivotal point in Segwick’s life. It is almost as if he had set a challenge to Mr. Hundert by cheating to see if he had the character to stand up to him in spite of who his father was and Mr. Hundert failed. His failure cost him Segwick’s respect.
The point is that there is an absolute measure of right and wrong … Cheating is wrong no matter who is doing or why they are doing it. Financial success does not signify that it is ok. As Mr. Hundert, found the real success was in the boys who learned true character and lived by it!
I do not share this opinion, I think that there is an absolute standard of right and wrong. Mr. Hundert said something to the effect that character is what defines a man. Character being the ability to define the difference between right and wrong and choose the right thing to do. Mr. Hundert tells Segwick that he had failed him as a teacher, after discovering that Segwick had cheated once again at the competition. Many in the class thought that because Segwick was wealthy business man and politician Mr Hundert was successful at his job, the only thing I can think of is a verse in the Bible “For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?” Mark 8:36 (KJV)
This is not the only instance where the Bible talks about the difference in being financially successful and being a person of integrity, but it is the first one that came to mind. I think that Mr. Hundert was right he failed him in two areas. The first was when he changed Segwick’s grade to allow him to take part in the competition and a second time when he failed to call attention to his cheating. The reason I say this is because when Mr. Hundert confronts Segwick about the cheating, Segwick challenges him and asks why he didn’t disqualify him for cheating and if his father’s position had anything to do with his decision not to. Mr. Hundert says no, but Segwick knows the truth and that seems to be a pivotal point in Segwick’s life. It is almost as if he had set a challenge to Mr. Hundert by cheating to see if he had the character to stand up to him in spite of who his father was and Mr. Hundert failed. His failure cost him Segwick’s respect.
The point is that there is an absolute measure of right and wrong … Cheating is wrong no matter who is doing or why they are doing it. Financial success does not signify that it is ok. As Mr. Hundert, found the real success was in the boys who learned true character and lived by it!
Reflection on "Shitty First Drafts"
The first thing that caught my attention is the Title, in my house that word would get you in trouble. So, I was a little apprehensive as to what I might be reading, however once I got into it I enjoyed the reading. The writer has a caustic sense of humor, that makes you feel that she is a down to earth, I-don't-care-what-other-people think type of person. She encourages you to realize that very few people can just sit down and write great stuff, they have to work at it and revise it over and over and over until they get it to the point that they like it. This was a real encouragement to me because I have re-written my work so many times I sometimes feel I will never like it. But the Author here gives us permission to write badly the first time around and allows us to fail a few times before we get it right.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
My Brother is Home
It has been 6 long months since my mom received a hurried phone call from my little brother, who is in the Air Force, that he would be leaving the next day for Afghanistan. During that time we had received very little communication from him, he called one of my sisters twice I think. Then, a few weeks ago, we got a letter from him saying he would be home some time the end of the month (May), he hopped. Today I got a phone call from him! He is in Washington. After he attends two of his buddies funerals and receives his medals (two of them are pictured below), he will head back to North Dakota, where he is stationed, to check in with his unit and be debriefed. After which he will hopefully be given leave and allowed to come "home" to visit us! We are so excited and proud of him! My Dad is already planing a big home coming celebration for him!!! I can hardly wait to see and talk to him!!!
The Air Force Combat Action Medal and the Afghanistan Campaign Medal
The Air Force Combat Action Medal and the Afghanistan Campaign Medal
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Lessons from a Canoe Trip
A couple of weekends ago DH (Dear Husband) and I went on a camping and canoe trip with some friends.
It was my first time canoeing and after tipping the boat a few feet out in the water, with some communication we started to get the hang of it. That was when I started thinking about how much we could learn from our experience in the canoe.
The first thing I thought of was communication and just as it was very important that Matt and I communicated while we were canoeing in order not to tip over, or run into trees or rocks. It is also important for us to communicate to each other in our marriage, if we don't talk and discuss what our plans are for the future we will wind up not knowing what the other is doing and spinning in circles or crashing on the rocks. I was impressed with our communication...after we got started it went really well!
The second thing I noticed was that encouragement also played an important role in helping us achieve our goals.. again like in life.
The third thing I noticed was the trust part...Matt was behind me doing most of the steering, I couldn't see what he was doing and often, seeing danger ahead, I would try to jump in and fix the problem, only to have him tell me I to stop because I was messing things up...I got to wondering how often I do that in our marriage ... jump in and try to fix things because I can't see how what he's doing is going to work. Whereas if I just trust that he is paying attention and can handle it it usually worked out fine. This also has a great spiritual application because we can not see what God is doing in our lives and often want to put our oar in and fix things, when if we would just leave well enough alone we would see that God has everything under control.
All in all I think the canoe trip was a wonderful experience and I learned a valuable lesson!
It was my first time canoeing and after tipping the boat a few feet out in the water, with some communication we started to get the hang of it. That was when I started thinking about how much we could learn from our experience in the canoe.
The first thing I thought of was communication and just as it was very important that Matt and I communicated while we were canoeing in order not to tip over, or run into trees or rocks. It is also important for us to communicate to each other in our marriage, if we don't talk and discuss what our plans are for the future we will wind up not knowing what the other is doing and spinning in circles or crashing on the rocks. I was impressed with our communication...after we got started it went really well!
The second thing I noticed was that encouragement also played an important role in helping us achieve our goals.. again like in life.
The third thing I noticed was the trust part...Matt was behind me doing most of the steering, I couldn't see what he was doing and often, seeing danger ahead, I would try to jump in and fix the problem, only to have him tell me I to stop because I was messing things up...I got to wondering how often I do that in our marriage ... jump in and try to fix things because I can't see how what he's doing is going to work. Whereas if I just trust that he is paying attention and can handle it it usually worked out fine. This also has a great spiritual application because we can not see what God is doing in our lives and often want to put our oar in and fix things, when if we would just leave well enough alone we would see that God has everything under control.
All in all I think the canoe trip was a wonderful experience and I learned a valuable lesson!
Monday, June 1, 2009
First Day of School
Well, today was a day filled with firsts, my first day of school, college that is and my children's first day in day care.
It started with an early wake up call at 5:30am, I need some time to wake up so I turned the alarm off and went back to sleep, at 6:00 am the alarm went off again, this time I couldn't ignore
it, as much as I wanted to. I got up, showered and dressed. I then got my daughter up, great news she and her bed were dry!!! Can you tell we're potty training? I sent her to the bathroom and helped her get dressed while Daddy was getting Bubby ready. I grabbed a bite to eat and we actually made it out the door by 7:00 am, on time for once in our lives.
My first stop was to drop the kids off at daycare, DD (darling daughter) ran straight to her classroom and started playing, DS (darling Son) was much more hesitant and came running back to me crying. Since I have run an in-home-daycare for the last several years, I know that it takes a while for kids his age to adjust, so after hugging him for a few minutes we left. The next stop was to take Daddy to work, he ended up being a half-hour early, maybe that will be the redeeming factor to me turning the house upside down by going back to school!
I got to school with plenty of time to find my first class, Business Math, it was good. I like my instructor and think it will be very beneficial to me, although learning how to balance a checkbook was a little easy! Oh well, that just means my home work tonight will be that much easier.
I had an hour and a half before my next class, Comp 1, so I went and picked up my calculator I needed for my Math class and grabbed a snack out of the car to hold me over till supper time. I found the room where my next class was going to be and since there was a table right outside the door I parked myself right there and pulled out my laptop to try and get connected to the Internet. After a few tries, I succeeded and spent the next hour checking my email and browsing the web. Comp 1 looks to be a very fun class... a lot of work but a lot of fun as well.
I am very impressed with the fact that, so far, my teachers are not interested in shoving rules down us, but want to help us learn how to apply our knowledge in the real world!
My first day of classes was done, now it was time to go pick up the kids and see how they did in their new environment. It was nap time when I reached the day care so I picked up my little sleepy heads and brought them home, they played computer games and watched TV while I set up this blog and started on my homework!
Well, I've got to go eat supper before I starve to death, so I'll see you in class!!!
It started with an early wake up call at 5:30am, I need some time to wake up so I turned the alarm off and went back to sleep, at 6:00 am the alarm went off again, this time I couldn't ignore
it, as much as I wanted to. I got up, showered and dressed. I then got my daughter up, great news she and her bed were dry!!! Can you tell we're potty training? I sent her to the bathroom and helped her get dressed while Daddy was getting Bubby ready. I grabbed a bite to eat and we actually made it out the door by 7:00 am, on time for once in our lives.
My first stop was to drop the kids off at daycare, DD (darling daughter) ran straight to her classroom and started playing, DS (darling Son) was much more hesitant and came running back to me crying. Since I have run an in-home-daycare for the last several years, I know that it takes a while for kids his age to adjust, so after hugging him for a few minutes we left. The next stop was to take Daddy to work, he ended up being a half-hour early, maybe that will be the redeeming factor to me turning the house upside down by going back to school!
I got to school with plenty of time to find my first class, Business Math, it was good. I like my instructor and think it will be very beneficial to me, although learning how to balance a checkbook was a little easy! Oh well, that just means my home work tonight will be that much easier.
I had an hour and a half before my next class, Comp 1, so I went and picked up my calculator I needed for my Math class and grabbed a snack out of the car to hold me over till supper time. I found the room where my next class was going to be and since there was a table right outside the door I parked myself right there and pulled out my laptop to try and get connected to the Internet. After a few tries, I succeeded and spent the next hour checking my email and browsing the web. Comp 1 looks to be a very fun class... a lot of work but a lot of fun as well.
I am very impressed with the fact that, so far, my teachers are not interested in shoving rules down us, but want to help us learn how to apply our knowledge in the real world!
My first day of classes was done, now it was time to go pick up the kids and see how they did in their new environment. It was nap time when I reached the day care so I picked up my little sleepy heads and brought them home, they played computer games and watched TV while I set up this blog and started on my homework!
Well, I've got to go eat supper before I starve to death, so I'll see you in class!!!
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